It’s time for a Divinely Selfish Revolution! Put yourself first.
Posted on 11 July 2012
I’m calling for a Divinely Selfish Revolution! That’s right — a radical movement of people re-prioritizing their lives and putting themselves first. A revolution of people who are willing to claim that they matter and who structure their lives in such a way that they are at the top of their own list of to-dos. That kind of selfishness is golden!
Martyrdom is not a virtue. Sacrificing your own needs and desires for the sake of a job, a relationship, or a reputation, only leads to exhaustion and an inner suicide.
So many people I talk to are so exhausted by their life that they can no longer even remember what lights their fire or floats their boat. Most are just going through the motions of busy-ness — inhabiting their lives in body, not in spirit.
Absenteeism in spirit is not a gift to your job, your loved ones or the world. And if you don’t even remember what it feels like to feel like yourself, I can tell you, you are NOT showing up as much of a gift to anyone.
The deal is, the law of love never contradicts itself. If you do what is most loving for you first, it will always be, in the grand cosmic scheme of things, the most loving thing for the other. We are interconnected, never separate, a unified field, and as the stewardess will tell you, you’ve got to put on your own mask first.
Somehow, in the drive to succeed, climb the corporate ladder, or keep up with the Jones’, a legacy of self-sacrifice has been created that doesn’t serve anyone. It’s a legacy that leaves us forgetting to even take care of ourselves.
Putting yourself first will fill your well. It will leave you with the energy to deal with any emergency that might appear (and truly, if you’re not in emergency, stop your crazy making!) and it will allow you to experience that kind of juicy passion and love of life that will overflow in your work performance, your friendships, and your romantic life.
To put yourself first means you take care of yourself. The most basic of self-care routines involves moving your body, quieting your mind, and eating healthy food – daily! Those simple daily actions in themselves would be revolutionary in the average person’s life. Yet, to put yourself first ALSO means that you dream your dreams, energize them with time and action, and nurture them. If you love to write, it means you write! If you love to read, it means you read. If you love to dance, paint, or invent, you do it! Because doing it is expressing what is in you to be expressed, it’s being your full self authentically, honestly, and passionately! And, Sweet-Heart, that’s what you’re HERE to BE!
And no, this is not about escapism – it’s not about diving into some other endeavor to avoid what you are ‘supposed to do’. That can look like selfishness, and yet, it’s not. That’s the behavior that comes up when you’re so denying yourself full expression that the only defense left is to refuse to participate in your life. Skip that!
Go to the heart of it. You know you’re there when you’re enlivened by what you’re about. And if you’re really out of practice in meeting your needs, you just may have to go on a passion quest to find yourself again. And though it could take days or months to spark yourself back to life, it’s a most worthy quest to uncover your passion because your passion is your gift to the world. Your greatest service will come from finding and unleashing it. So will your greatest joy.
You matter. Your joy matters. Your passion matters. Put yourself at the top of your priority list. Honor and care for your needs and see what happens in the rest of your life.