Chill out — really, it’s okay.

Posted on 31 October 2011

What’s the difference between chilling out and stalling out?

It’s a difference in tone.  To chill out is to relax and wait.  To stall out might look the same outwardly, but it feels frustrating.  It’s the space of sputtering, wheel spinning attempts at momentum without any actual movement.  Stalling out is also that sick-feeling space of putting things off, avoiding, or breaking down.

Sometimes, however,  it’s just not time to move.  Sometimes, especially before times of big change in our lives, the Universe takes a little time to rearrange, dematerialize and reorganize circumstances and conditions in order to prepare the way for what is coming next.

And the best thing to do when THAT is happening, is to chill out.  No point in making big decisions or forcing movement. And no point in beating one’s self up for the lack of movement.  Save your energy.  Relax and rest.  Turn inward and listen.

Work with me long enough and you’ll come to find that I’m an advocate of that juicy, if sometimes uncomfortable place of ‘don’t know yet’.  I highly celebrate that space of ‘gathering information.’  I’ve come to recognize those rich in-between decision places as good places to practice trust and surrender.

That said, I’m also an advocate of being decisive.  And that’s not a contradiction to the above.  I’m an advocate for choosing to be wherever you are.  If you’re in a place of ‘don’t know yet’, choose to be okay with it. Give yourself permission to be there. Don’t fight it, don’t beat yourself up for it, and don’t try so hard.  Choose it and choose it powerfully.

That’s the chill tone.

Chilling is allowing.  It’s not tense.  It’s not anxious.  Thus, when the new direction opens and your internal guidance system starts to give direction for movement, chilling quickly turns to a new state — FLOWING.

Trust it.  You’re not stuck.  You’re not going to be stuck.  Wait, listen, and anticipate it – the tide will turn.  Chill out and enjoy the rest.  When the flow begins, you’ll be ready.

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